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A famous golfer was playing golf in the Texas. He hits his golf ball across a fence into a farmer’s field. When he attempts to cross the fence the farmer pulls up in a pick-up, he jumps out and asks the golfer what he is doing on his property?
“Retrieving my golf ball I just hit” he replied.
“It’s on my side of the fence so now it’s my ball” replied the farmer.
The golfer asked the farmer if he recognized who he was talking to?
“No” replied the farmer, “I don’t know and I don’t care”
“I’m a famous golfer on the PGA Tour, I’ve won Major Championships and been a leading money winner.” “If you don’t give me my ball back, I can hire a lawyer and sue you for your truck, your farm and everything you own” “I’ll leave you penniless and on the street!”
“Well” said the farmer “In Texas we follow the Three Kick Law”
“Never heard of it”, said the golfer.
“I kick you three times, if you can stand and kick me back time three times the ball is yours.” he said.
He grew up in a tough neighborhood and figured he could take this old farmer, “Fair enough” he said.
So, the farmer kicked him in the groin, doubling him up. He then kicked him in the face and then when he was rolling on the ground kicked him in the ribs. “Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh” he moaned for what seemed to be an eternity. He laid there moaning, rolling, tears in his eyes then motionless.
Finally, the golfer gets up and says ”All right it’s my turn,”
“Aw, forget it” says the farmer “You can have it”
Editor: There is a fantastic version of this joke on YouTube by Buddy Hackett on Johnny Carson.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aww4HT5g7ig about shooting a duck!