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You Don’t Get A Shot Here!

May 18, 2021GregSandy's Humor Page

A businessman was attending a conference in Africa . He had a free

day and wanted to play a round of golf and was directed to a golf

course in the nearby jungle. After a short journey, he arrived at the

course and asked the pro if he could get on.

“Sure,” said the pro, “What’s your handicap?” Not wanting to admit

that he had an 18 handicap, he decided to cut it a bit. “Well, it’s

16,” said the businessman, “but what’s the relevance since I’ll be

playing alone?”

“It’s very important for us to know,” said the pro, who then called a

caddy.

“Go out with this gentleman,” said the pro, “his handicap is 16.”

The businessman was very surprised at this constant reference to his

handicap. The caddy picked up the businessman’s bag and a large rifle.

Again, the businessman was surprised, but decided to ask no questions.

They arrived on the 1st hole, a par-4.

“It’s wise to avoid those trees on the left,” said the caddy.

Needless to say, the businessman duck-hooked his ball into the trees.

He found his ball and was about to punch it out when he heard the

loud crack of the rifle and a large snake fell dead from a tree above

his head.

The caddy stood next to him with the rifle smoking in his hand.

“That’s the Black Mamba, the most poisonous snake in all Africa .

You’re lucky I was here with you.”

After taking a bogey, they moved to the 2nd hole, a par-5. “Good to

avoid those bushes on the right,” says the caddy. Of course, the

businessman’s ball went straight into the bushes. As he went to pick

up his ball, he heard the loud crack of the caddy’s rifle once again,

and a huge lion fell dead at his feet.

“I’ve saved your life again,” said the caddy.

The 3rd hole was a par-3 with a lake in front of the green. The

businessman’s ball came up just short of the green and rolled back to

the edge of the water.

To take a shot, he had to stand with one foot in the lake. As he was

about to swing, a large crocodile emerged from the water and bit off

much of his right leg.

As he fell to the ground bleeding and in great pain, he saw the caddy

with the rifle propped at his side, looking on unconcernedly.

“Why didn’t you kill it?” asked the man incredulously. “I’m sorry, sir,”

said the caddy. “This is the 17th handicap hole. You don’t get a shot

here.”

And that, my golfing friends, is why you should never lie about your

Handicap!

Sandy Bagger® says “Why you should report an honest handicap especially if it’s a vanity handicap”

“Bag a Bagger Today”

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